My mum was taking the mini in for service so she thought , as it was fairly near (they lied .it was blooming miles) to Battersea Park, she'd combine the wait with a walk for me.
A horrible ginger man called Monty said we had been misinformed about the waiting time and there was basically someone more important than us whose car they were going to do first.
To placate my mum, whose face was turning purple with incandescence...........well he was a bit of a pratt and up his own jacksy........the Monty said he'd get the car delivered home to us.
So mum thought we'd go on the bus.
She sat in her rightful seat..the one for the elderly or with children. I am basically her child and she is a pensioner, so we both qualified.
A woman in the seat behind got shirty and asked for me to be moved, so she could get off the bus.
After she'd gone the bus driver said that I should be taken upstairs.
Well I was having a bad day. Could hardly walk as it was. So my mum says no way can I make the stairs.
There were a lot of ugly mean fed-up-looking faces .........gosh there's a lot of riff-raff on buses.......so mum took a decision not to hold up the bus by arguing the toss with the driver.......who was patently scared of dogs........probably kicked one when he was a kid...........and in a huff we stepped off the bus.
My mum laughed to herself cos you can do things like that..switch buses, when you have your Senior Citizen's bus pass. (incidentally, she's taken it out of it's obvious Freedom bus-pass red cover and put it into a white wallet, so peeps don't know it's not an ordinary Oyster card).
We walked a little way and then mum talked to another driver on a single decker. He said, no prob with the pooch, climb aboard.
If I could be arsed, I'd write to uncle Ken Livingstone asking him where the rules are posted that dogs have to travel on the upper deck.
But life is too short , especially mine.......and the lesson we learnt is that buses are shit, some drivers are shit, passengers are mostly shit, and there's a lot of shit on the ground left by careless dog owners.
My mum had to wash my feet when I got home.
